🧃 Sprint Planning & Other Monday Myths — Tales from the Dev Side

Welcome to Monday:
Where your calendar is full, your soul is empty, and your coffee is the only thing compiling.

Let’s be honest. Monday mornings in software land are less “fresh start” and more “hotfix for the weekend’s emotional damage.” You wake up, check your phone, and realize your team has already sent 17 Teams messages, 3 passive-aggressive comments on GitHub, and one cryptic emoji in the group chat that might be a cry for help.

🧘‍♂️ 9:15 AM — The Calm Before the Storm

You sit down with your morning brew, ready to ease into the day. Your laptop boots up. You open your calendar.
“Sprint Planning — 9:30 AM.”
You sigh. You were hoping for a gentle onboarding into the week. Instead, you’re about to be asked to estimate how long it’ll take to “just add multi-language support” to a legacy codebase written in a dialect no one speaks anymore.

🧮 9:30 AM — The Estimation Olympics

PM: “So, how long will this take?”
You: “Depends. Are we counting emotional recovery time?”
Someone suggests Fibonacci points. Someone else suggests “just vibes.” You settle on a number that feels both wildly optimistic and deeply untrue.

🧼 11:00 AM — Cleaning Up the Weekend’s Code Crimes

You open a PR from Friday. You stare at it like it betrayed you.

// quick fix, will clean up later

You were the author. You feel shame. You refactor it while whispering apologies to future you.

🧠 2:00 PM — Deep Work (aka Avoiding Meetings)

You finally get into flow. You write elegant, scalable code. You solve a gnarly bug. You feel like a wizard.
Then your manager pings:

“Quick sync?”
You pretend not to see it. You consider faking a power outage. You remember you’re remote. You sigh and join.

🛌 6:00 PM — The Great Shutdown

You close your laptop. You stare into the void. You wonder if the void is hiring. You remember you love this job—just not on Mondays.

---

Dev’s Final Wisdom:
Mondays are like poorly documented APIs: confusing, occasionally broken, but somehow still functional. You survive them not with brute force, but with clever hacks, good teammates, and a sense of humor sharp enough to slice through sprint planning.

So wear your hoodie like armor, wield your keyboard like a sword, and remember: even the worst Mondays only last 24 hours. Unless you deploy on Friday. Then they last forever.